literature

... is Not a Survivor's Name

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feather--weather's avatar
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Literature Text

When Toni Ipres posted on her Facebook that she was back home from her week and a half long tour across the state, she expected that over the next twenty-four hours, she would receive tons of "welcome backs" from friends and family.

What she didn't expect was for Hanna to message her with a plea for help.

Hell, Toni didn't even know Hanna had a FB.

Hanna
toni i need ur help

Toni
What's up?

Hanna
its louis i need u to take bak ur xbox NOW

Louis? Oh, Hanna's little undead friend. What kind of problem could the Zombie be having that involved her XBox360?

Toni
I'll be there in a few




Twenty minutes later found Toni about to knock on room 306, waiting for Hanna or the green man to open up. Hanna, however, opened it up before she could do so. "Oh, thank god you're here Toni. I need help - Bill hasn't stopped playing."

"All day?" she asked, following him into the apartment so Hanna could close the door.

"All week!" Hanna hissed.

Toni blinked once, than twice. "Week? There's no way he could play it all week."

In response, Hanna gave Toni a wry look. "Francis doesn't need to sleep so he's just been playing non-stop. Seriously! Jonathan even found how to get our neighbor's wifi so he could play co-op online."

Well... Toni forgot about that. "So, this is bad because...?"

"Have you seen Phineas play Left 4 Dead?" the red head asked. "It's scary!"

That elicited a small chuckle out of Toni. "It can't be that bad."

Hanna rolled his eyes and pulled Toni further in. "Yes, yes it can."

Sitting in the middle of Hanna's one room apartment was Zombie, his thumbs moving across the control. It took a moment for Toni to make out the grumbling coming from the normally level-headed member. "Die zombie scum" and "God damned mother fucking horde" could be heard between snarls and general cursing. It would have been funny to hear such words come from Zombie's somewhat monotone voice except... It was really, really disturbing.

"See? This is what your game's done to Ferb!"

Yes, Toni saw Hanna's point. "What do you want me to do?"

"Take that blasted machine back and your little game, too" hissed Hanna as if it was obvious.

Toni sighed. That was easier said then done. "Why can't you do that yourself?"

"You think I didn't try? Ellis doesn't stop when I wake up, when I eat, or even when I get hurt trying to cook poptarts! Nothing's working!" Toni kind of felt bad at that moment - Hanna was honestly close to tears.

Huh, guess he really is worried about the Zombie's gaming habits. It's kind of cute. Nodding, Toni took a look around the apartment. "All right, I'll help, but only because it's my fault in the first place. You still have to find someone to fix my pendant, yanno."

"Yeah, yeah, jeeze, I know that. Just didn't think Nick would want me to go find 'em on my own though. See, another reason why you should help!"

That got Toni to just roll her eyes.  "Fine, fine. Now, Hanna, I need you to do this for me so we can get my TV and XBox outta here in one piece..."




Hanna didn't like asking his landlady for help, but as she was the only person who knew where all the little circuit breakers were, he had to talk to her. Right before he could open the door, the lights for his floor went out. There was a scuffle, a couple of un-womanly yips, and a mad dash out his door (which he finally opened) which, Hanna presumed, was Toni grabbing her shit and heading downstairs to the waiting taxi that would take her (and her shit) home. Hanna entered his home, not surprised to see Nick's eyes glowing in the darkness. Nick blinked once, then twice.

"Hanna, what happened?"

"Er... Nothing really, Whitaker. We gotta head over to Down the Rabbit Hole soon so I can meet up with somebody."

Whitaker raised an eyebrow. "And you didn't go without me?"

This caused Hanna to chuckle, as he wrapped his arms around Whitaker's shoulders. " 'Course not Keith. You'd get all worried an' stuff. Plus, I had to get you off the TV anyways - Toni wanted it back." Well, sort of.

"Oh, sorry about it."

"Naw, man, it's okay. Just... Let's not get so engrossed into games like that again, kay?"

"Sure Hanna," Keith said. "Could I borrow your computer before we go?" Keith felt a need to play more games and he had Hanna's (nearly bankrupt) credit card numbers memorized so it wouldn't be too hard to -

"No Coach, you can't download the Steam version of Left 4 Dead on my computer."

The Zombie opened his mouth -

"Or Team Fortress. No Valve for you."
Ha :iconzazu75:! I finally uploaded it! See, I did it!
And it's my first submission into :iconnot-a-boys-name: xD Wow, odd lulz.

Pretty much, our Zombie friend is having too much fun playing L4D, which scares the crap out of Hanna. So, Hanna finds a way to get rid of the object of Zombie's affection interest.

Names for {...} are those of survivors in L4D and L4D2... Except for Phineas and Ferb...

No beta, just me xD

<insert random pimpage here>
Hey, if anyone likes to RP, I'm starting a non-HiNaBN related one here - it's really small right now, but it should be fun "D
</end pimpage>


Hanna is Not a Boy's Name and all related characters is (c) :iconvert-is-ninja:
Left 4 Dead is (c) Valve
© 2010 - 2024 feather--weather
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UncleKasu's avatar
"Or Team Fortress. No Valve for you." AAHAHAHAHA!